NEED SOME FATHER ADVICE?

Julie thought that maybe we ought to have a page where father advice is available. I'm Barry, her husband, father of Nathan, Emma and Lilly -- and Bruce who is all grown up and glass blowing in Seattle...or rather working in the kitchen of a glass blowing school in Seattle, hoping to be noticed.

left to right Emma, Bruce, Lilly, Nathan

I don't think I can speak for all fathers, or all men if the discussions here make that necessary. I've always felt kind of like a non-man. Julie's mom, who lives with us, has told her that she should never use the vacuum cleaner when I am home because: "Men hate the sound of vacuuming." She's got other definitive ideas about who men are and what they think. Maybe she should give you the man's view?

But no, Julie wants me to do it. Maybe she's right. It feels that when I want to know what I'm thinking at any time, I just go to her. But she says the same about me.

Anyway, you may have questions that a father ought to take a shot at answering. Maybe about what's breaking down between you and your significant other. Maybe you're a single mother and need a second opinion, a father's perspective. Maybe you just want to penetrate the loneliness you feel when it's just you and the kids, all day, every day. Maybe you are a stay at home dad (there are quite a few already who love Julie's stories) and want to talk about what you're giving up vs. what you're gaining. There are many maybe's.

I am not without qualifications. Besides the four kids I helped (and am helping) bring up, I taught school at the elementary and high school levels and worked as an organizer and group facilitator. I spent many years making movies and television but I question whether that made me qualified to do anything else really. I guess that the strongest thing that prepares me to discuss parenting with anyone is my heart (which Julie mentions quite a bit in the book). I have a big, fat, overflowing heart.

And I don't mind the sound of a vacuum cleaner in the morning.

Father Advice from a very humble non-man dad who has opinions that come like pulling teeth, but I'll get past that ...

I look forward to the coming conversations.

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